Funniest premium yet

We do get a lot of junk mail. Since I am the official mail clerk in the house, I look at all of it, open and date what looks important or interesting, and throw out the rest. There are many better uses of my time than deeply perusing unsolicited junk, so when we got a big glossy postcard today with some verbiage about “CASH GIVEAWAY” and “WIN $10,000,” I was ready to ditch it. But then, in the lower left corner of the card, in a yellow box, I saw this text:

“Just for stopping by with this flyer, we’ll give you FREE Toilet Paper, 4-ROLL PACK (Reg. $5.99, Must Present Postcard April 7-17, 2016. One Per Family. First 250 Guests.)”

This struck me as quite humorous. Of all the things that could be given away to entice people to come to an event, toilet paper?!? Seriously?!?

Josiah later looked the card, reading both sides, and made this commentation:

“This is for OLD people! Here’s your “winning number,” so this is some kind of lottery, for STUPID old people. And free hot dogs. . . This is for FAT old people. And toilet paper! This is for old people with other problems.”

To which Scott replied, “Well, old fat people eating hot dogs. . . they’re probably gonna need that toilet paper!”

I’m not planning to attend the SPRING FLING Show & Sales Event. A free four-roll pack of toilet paper just doesn’t get it for me.

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